Painful Gratitude

Disclaimer: 
Please understand that, in no way, is this being written to seek sympathy of any kind at all. 
(SYMPATHY can be found in the dictionary, between SELFISH and UNHEALTHY)


Pain - excrutiating pain - like a neverending severe Charley Horse, making it almost impossible to walk.  With this new persistent pain in my left leg, along with the arthritis in my right leg, walking (even with a cane) has been quite a challenge.

Swelling - to the point of feeling as though the insides of my leg would explode right through my skin.

Redness - on the lower portion of my left leg, between my knee and my ankle - hot to the touch - - so much so, that it felt as though a heater, set at a temperature of about 100 degrees, was buried under my skin.

(picture is not my leg, but a close example of what mine was like)

Fever - vacillating between 101.5 and slightly below normal temp, often feeling "infected".

Bruised, sore stomach, feeling like a pin cushion from the daily injections.

(again, picture is not me, but just an example - without the bruises)

(I do apologize for the graphics - not pleasant, I know;  sorry)

But, there is a reason for the description.

Sometimes people have NO warning - NO pain to signal the presence of a disease or condition that potentially could be life-threatening.  Instead, without medical attention, the condition becomes worse and their life is ended suddenly.


This is why I am so very very GRATEFUL for the PAIN I've been experiencing.  I won't lie; I'd prefer not to have pain.  However, without this chronic pain, there's a good chance I may not be here to be writing about this right now.


I was diagnosed with DVT (Deep Vein Thrombosis) - - - - more commonly known as blood clots. 

("B" below - that's me - obviously NOT normal)

My Ultrasound looked as though someone had taken a crayon and colored in almost the entire lower portion of my leg.  Mighty scary.

(Just a diagram below; NOT my Ultrasound)

To what does this all translate?

(of course)

Because of the pain, and because I listened to the pain, and because I heard about what the pain was warning me ................

and, with the help of several Doctors, Nurses, Urgent Care, the Ultrasound person at the Heart and Vascular Center, the Coumadin Clinic, and all those I've yet to see in future appointments (the Vascular Surgeon, for one) .................

Because of all of this ................

My heart is filled with GRATITUDE

Most of all .....

I am GRATEFUL

for the love,

concern,

healing energy,

thoughtfulness,

kindness,

and support

of my amazing wonderful family and friends.

You know who you are ♥

(and I do, too)

I love each of you with my heart and soul ♥